You ask that I believe
‘In what?,’ I ask you
You tell me forever shall be mine
I say tomorrow has no meaning
You ask that I take your hand and believe
In something that I cannot see
You say that you are creation
I say that with you immortal touch
I have seen you bring mortality
You ask that I follow
Your lead into your kingdom eternal
I say I cannot step behind
That which I do not trust
You say you are the bringer of light
I close my eyes
And step back into the shadows where I belong
You say your love is flawless and absolute
I say I’ve never been held by arms that loved
You say you will bring me peace
I say I’ve known only pain and suffering
You tell me in the end all will be ok
I say in the end it will not matter
You ask that my soul I give to you to keep
With knees bent and hands grasped you ask that I pray
I say my soul is dark and not worth giving
I bow to no one, I cannot beg nor plead
You say no matter what you will be there for me
I ask where were you when I needed someone the most
As I walked my darkest hour
You say you will never turn your back on me
I ask where was your guidance when I needed to be rescued
From anger, from hate, from me
You ask that I believe
I say ok
But only in me
-December, 1999
