29 Tuesday Apr 2014
Posted in Poetry
29 Tuesday Apr 2014
Posted in Poetry
29 Tuesday Apr 2014
Posted in Poetry
You were the bad habit
I never could drop
You were the good habit
I never could learn
You were the cure
I could never take
You were the wound
That never could heal
You were the dream
I could never quite finish
You were the nightmare
I could never quite shake
You were the soul
That I longed to love
You were the soul
That I needed to hate
You were the story
I ached to read
You were the story
That hurt to write
You were all of the things
That made me human
You were all of the things
That made me a monster
You were
But you never were
-February, 2014
29 Tuesday Apr 2014
Posted in Poetry
We spend the Spring of our lives learning
Learning to walk
Learning to Talk
Learning to live
We spend the Summer of our lives questioning everything we learned
Still unsure who we are meant to be
Wondering how to live
We spend the Fall of out lives lamenting the time we thought we wasted in the Spring and Summer
Wishing we could go back
Trying to relive what we once were
We spend the Winter of our lives remembering and cherishing the previous seasons
Hopefully witnessing and grandchildren enjoying their Spring’s and Summer’s
Getting ready for our final season to end
-September, 2013
01 Tuesday Apr 2014
Posted in Poetry
Doubting ourselves is very easy
Making ourselves not feel this way is not
People that haven’t dealt with these issues
they think it’s easy
“just stop”
if only it were so easy
What I have leaned is there is a difference
between what I “feel”
and what “is”
It doesn’t make those feelings
any less painful
But it does help me to deal with it
to step outside of myself
and know
I may “feel”
useless, disgusting, ugly, fat, skinny, dumb
(my God the list can go on and on)
Even if I “feel” those things
I understand I am not
there is a difference
It doesn’t make the pain any less real
but it does help me to keep going
because there is a difference
-July, 2013
01 Tuesday Apr 2014
Posted in Poetry
One ring, two
her name flashes across the screen
For a split second
I almost forgot
For a split second
my heart just stopped
Then it all comes back around
came crashing down
Now I recall
she ended it all
The night she forgot
being faithful is more than just an after thought
-May, 1998
01 Tuesday Apr 2014
Posted in Poetry
You ask that I believe
‘In what?,’ I ask you
You tell me forever shall be mine
I say tomorrow has no meaning
You ask that I take your hand and believe
In something that I cannot see
You say that you are creation
I say that with you immortal touch
I have seen you bring mortality
You ask that I follow
Your lead into your kingdom eternal
I say I cannot step behind
That which I do not trust
You say you are the bringer of light
I close my eyes
And step back into the shadows where I belong
You say your love is flawless and absolute
I say I’ve never been held by arms that loved
You say you will bring me peace
I say I’ve known only pain and suffering
You tell me in the end all will be ok
I say in the end it will not matter
You ask that my soul I give to you to keep
With knees bent and hands grasped you ask that I pray
I say my soul is dark and not worth giving
I bow to no one, I cannot beg nor plead
You say no matter what you will be there for me
I ask where were you when I needed someone the most
As I walked my darkest hour
You say you will never turn your back on me
I ask where was your guidance when I needed to be rescued
From anger, from hate, from me
You ask that I believe
I say ok
But only in me
-December, 1999
01 Tuesday Apr 2014
Posted in Poetry
In my dreams
The dead come back
They haunt me
Taunt me
Remind me of my past
Specters in the night
Ghosts in the dark
I can’t seem to get away
From a past that always comes back
I try to forget
But in my sleep
They come to remind me
In my dreams
The dead come back
They chase me
Catch me
Remind me what I’ve done
Spirits in the closet
Shades under my bed
I can’t seem to escape
From a past that wont seem to forgive
I try to repent
But in my sleep
They won’t let me rest
In my dreams
The dead come back
-January, 1998
01 Tuesday Apr 2014
Posted in Poetry
I wish I knew
What to say
When I look deep
Into your eyes
I feel so lost
My words are gone
I wish I knew
What to say
When you stand so close
I feel so far
My nerves are lost
I wish I knew
How to say
What goes on
Inside my heart
Every time we speak
I dance around
The words wont come
I feel so scared
I wish I knew
How to convey
What my soul
Wants to say
I wish you knew
What I wanted to say
Maybe it wouldn’t be so hard
For me to say
-November, 1997
01 Tuesday Apr 2014
I am the terror in your dream
I am the reason behind your scream
I am the shadow lurking in your heart
I am the inspiration for every sad piece of art
I am the darkness drifting in the night
I am the danger hiding just out of sight
I am anger boiling within
I am the raging storm getting ready to begin
I am all the evil you can and can not see
I am just me
-May, 1997
Wounded Memories 